Where Things Are

I sometimes forget where things are.

I chalk this up not to old age, or even to “senior moments,” and hopefully not to that dreaded disease which begins with the letter “A,” but rather to the fact that, as the late George Carlin observed, we all have too much “stuff.”

It’s easy to keep track of five items, more difficult to keep track of 500 items, and nearly impossible to remember where 5,000 items are kept.

Take books, for example. When I buy a book, whether I read it or not, I do not throw it out. It will eventually end up in one of several bookcases – or elsewhere in my house. I now have thousands of books, many of which have a special meaning to me. But how can I possibly remember where a book I bought in 1983 will be found? I know it’s somewhere in the house (because I don’t throw books away), but where? If I were a librarian, I suppose I could keep my books in alphabetical order by author, but then I’d have to remember all the authors. And putting a paperback next to a hardcover or coffee table book doesn’t look attractive. And then there would be the problem of constantly moving the books to make room for new ones.

To solve the problem of not remembering where things are, I’m developing a system. It’s simple, really. My system is to take a basic spiral notebook and list where things are.

Here are some examples:

batteries are in a blue box on shelf near computer

cell phone equipment and info is in the bottom drawer of dresser

light bulbs are in the second floor hall closet

You get the idea.

Now all I have to remember is to make entries in the notebook.

And remember where I put the notebook.

My wallet

I don’t remember when I began carrying a wallet, but I remember when I lost it for the first time. It seems like only yesterday.

In fact, it was yesterday.

My wife and I were returning from a barbeque/pool party. I had removed my wallet from my pocket when I changed into my bathing suit. I carefully placed the wallet in the bag which contained our beach towels and dry clothes. It was still in that bag as we drove home, stopping only to drop off a relative.

As I waited in the passenger seat of our vehicle, I decided to use the time to make sure the wallet was still in the bag in the back of the vehicle. I got out and checked. It was still there. For some reason, and don’t ask me to explain it, I thought it wise to remove it, for safe keeping, to the front of the vehicle where I was sitting.

The next morning, when I got ready to go out, I couldn’t find my wallet.

Instant panic.

I searched everywhere, including inside the vehicle and the driveway, with no luck. Nevertheless, I was convinced it had to be somewhere inside my house because I was certain I had it with me when I got home the previous night.

I left the house without my wallet, but confident I would find it upon my return.

That, however, did not stop me from worrying about it all day. I tried to recall what was in my wallet. There were the usual credit cards, driver’s license, library card, supermarket cards, and assorted other documents. I tried to keep the items I carried in my wallet to a minimum in order to reduce the size of the wallet in my pocket. Many years ago I had photocopied all the items I carried in my wallet, but that list was long outdated, even if I could locate it.

More panic set in as I imagined someone pulling up to the pump and using my credit cards to get gas. I’d be maxed out in a matter of minutes.

My wife, knowing of my predicament, had called the relative we dropped off that night and asked her to look in her driveway for the wallet. Sure enough, in hour 7 of the missing wallet, I received word that it had been located in the driveway, a little wet (it had rained overnight) but still intact.

A feeling of relief spread over me.

From now on, I won’t leave home without it.